cyclical despairfeatured

a heart beats in my chest and 

my lower belly 

clenches around the hollow

carved out of the 

Life 

that grew there 

down the drain 

with a quart of blood and 

shreds of my flayed heart 

find their way out 

of my mouth and 

my eyes and 

my hands 

shake uncontrollably as i 

cradle this cursed body 

piloted by 

this cursed Mind 

a scrap of my 

supposedly 

beautiful Soul 

but 

“i” feel like 

the ugliest thing 

in all Creation and 

i resent this Soul 

for choosing this Life and 

i resent this Self for 

the suffering it’s brought 

upon others and 

me 

sabotaged by my own wounds 

inflicted by ghosts who 

hound my every step 

my dreams 

my thoughts 

my Spirit 

my Life